Been to Sheila's BBQ at Costa Sand Pasir Ris... It was an ok one... cept that this is the first BBQ I've attended that does not serve chicken wings. Hahaha.

Did most of the cooking with dar, and Jane's Sister, Michelle. Had a few hotdogs, alot of mushrooms, a small nibble of fish and stingray, squid. And I'm actually not very filled. ;)

Sigh, basically, I have no mood to blog. Ain't feeling very ok since morning. and I think I have got an eye infection in my left eye as it's kinda red and every morning it's like there's sticky things stuck to my eye lashes. Whatever.






"I can't be perfect and I ain't trusted all these while..."

Having a slight fever now as I'm typing this... 38.3° . Then so poor thing I have to spend 4 hours alone by myself at orchard til about 2230hours. then can meet dar|in again. She got wedding to attend.

So xin ku. Cough also throat very pain. think i heaty. drink plain water also pain....

sigh...

Right, just read Dar|in's blog and decided to add in a fair share of mine. :D

Am back in Singapore after the trip to Pulau Rawa, some island off the coast of Mersing. It was a last minute trip which took me off to a beautiful beach haven. Clear waters, plentiful corals and scary black fishes which swims very fast towards your snorkling goggles as if wanting to bite your face, clean white beaches with sands that feels "oooh-so-smooth", nice breeze while you tan on the silky soft beach..

Hahaha, have I got you tempted?

Dar|in called sometime in the last afternoon of Fridae asking if I wanna go to this island in Malaysia, And I thought after so long of a period of tensed up atmosphere between us both, we should go and relax a little. So I said yeah, lets go. *Anyways, the bill comes after I get my pay for this month* So it's like quite okay since it's also quite cheap. Yeah, so so last minute that after my work I have to go home and pack immediately.

Left for Johor at 6am in the morning and reached the beach haven at bout 10 plus 11. Played in the clear waters while waiting for our room to be cleaned and ready to check in. The room isn't as good as the one in Batam, but it's still okay lah. (But I still like the Batam one....) After we checked in, we explored the island abit since we're the Island Virgins (*says so by Jane and Sheila). Had lunch and went back to the room to nap liaoz cos so lethargic from the sun. Woke up ready for dinner le. hahaha. had BBQ for dinner. After that played Jenga Extreme and Blackjack til 11 plus, after that continued watching the Euro 2004 Portugal vs Greece first half coz cannot tahan liaoz, eyes tearing and wanna close lia0z.

The next day woke up bout 9am for breakie. had Happy Breakie for breakfast. (Just in case you dun know the term Happie Breakie, please go eat Cartel's Ultimate Delight breakfast, and you'll know how this term came about). Then after that snorkelled abit before we leave for mainland M'sia. The corals are a tad scary for my taste, they look menacing. Heehee, the fishes are so plentiful and colorful. Saw some fish that looks like colorful rainbow capsules swimming in thew water. Also alot of ikan Bilis that nibble at your outstretched fingers. :)

Left at bout 1.30pm today, reached SG about 6pm. Now abit chao dah now. Shoulders, arms and face abit like red red kenna cooked like that. Also must go find cream like dar|in did. Heehee.

5:14 PM 6/7/04

Many things have happened through the weekend... things that made people sad, angry, worried, and misunderstood. Things that may change my life forever. But I'm now glad that it's not happening. I'm glad that we're okay. I'm glad that things didn't go anymore worst.

I guess it's all about both who can't see eye to eye on certain issues thus a storm brewed. It felt like the movie 'The Day After Tmr' where all rain and storm and hurricane occur just in one night. It's scary. I thought I would have lost her forever. I thought that I would have made her unhappy by not letting go. I've said something that night... which I would still hold on to til my very end of life. You should know what is it. No matter what I'll still be here waiting if you wanna let go. I would still be here. Rain or shine. Light or dark. I'll still be here.

You pleaded with me to let go. But how can I do it? I have given all that I have for this past 20 months. I love you and only you. And letting go is not something I would do. I will hold on til my very last breath if I had to.

you're just too precious to just let go like that. You're everything to me for this past 20 months. You're a treasure that I have. You're my pillar to lean on. You're my shoulder to cry on. You're my arms to hold on to.

Sigh, I just hope that nothing like what we did would ever happen again. I really dun want it to happen again.....

I dunno what's gonna happen next.

I was asked to let go. But I wouldn't becos I see everything in this relationship. I will hold on till the end... even if it ever happens. But I will still hold on.....

No matter what...

happy birthday darling