Lord help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that You and I together can't handle.
Amen.

I can't sleep....

I took a flu pill supposedly causes drowsiness... But I'm not drowsy...

Can I down a shot of vodka?

Can I down a can o beer too??

havent been in here for a while... too busy with werk.. too busy with other things as well.

Not in a very happy mood... Firstly, I'm down with a flu... jus finished my strong antibiotics just last monday because o a serious throat infection and now a new flu virus hit me... Can't stand it...

Secondly, my grandma has been admitted into the hospital because o an abrupt heart attack Sunday morning @ 5+ am... She's always been healthy an all, eat a good diet, steered clear of super oily food... But now she has 3 clogged blood vessels. 2 o them 60% clogged and one o them 95% clogged which resulted in the heart attack. I'm so afraid now... I feel like not werking and taking care of her... I can't bear another episode of this happening again. She has a cardio angioplasty surgery done with a stent inplanted...

I would like to thank my princess for staying with me thru the whole of todae's episode.. I love her so much. Thanks once again....

Been in a "wallow in sadness" mood for a while already.. Am still feeling that til now. I dunno... maybe it's just me causing everyone sorrow or something and I feel inadequate bout myself.. I feel I'm not doing everything I can for people around me.. I feel that I'm kinda bad in a way. I dunno... sigh...

I think I shouldn't be asking anyone for anything... not even from my parents.. I should be living off myself at this age.. but what the fuck am I doing now? Jus a small cook in a small cafe earning small peanuts...

I find that I'm angry at myself at times.

Damn...

"Don't Lie" Black Eyed Peas

[WILL]
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry
Hey, baby my nose is getting big
I noticed it be growing when I been telling them fibs
Now you say your trust's getting weaker
Probably coz my lies just started getting deeper
And the reason for my confession is that I learn my lesson
And I really think you ought to know the truth
Because I lied and I cheated and I lied a little more
But after I did it I don't know what I did it for
I admit that I have been a little immature
Fucking with your heart like I was the predator
In my book of lies I was the editor
And the author
I forged my signature
And now I apologise for what I did to you
Cos what you did to me I did to you

[FERGIE]
No,no, no, no baby, no, no, no, no don't lie
No, no, no, no, yeah, you know, know, know, know, you gotta try
What you gonna do when it all comes out
When I really see you & what you're all about

No, no, no baby, no, no, no, no don't lie
Yeah, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you gotta try

[APL]
She said I'm leaving
Cos she can't take the pain
It's hard to continue this love it ain't the same
Can't forget the things that I've done inside her brain
Too many lies committed too many games
She feeling like a fool getting on the last train
Trying to maintain but the feeling won't change
I'm sorry for the things that I've done and what I became
Caught up in living my life in the fast lane
Blinded by lights, cameras, you know the fame
I don't know the reason why I did these things

[APL and FERGIE]
And I lie and I lie and I lie and I lie
And now our emotions are drained
Cos I lie and I lie and a little lie lie
And now your emotions are drained

[FERGIE]
No, no, no, no baby, no, no, no, no don't lie (no, don't you lie)
No, no, no, no, yeah, you know, know, know, know, you gotta try (got to try, got to try)
What you gonna do when it all comes out (what you gonna do baby)
When I really see you & what you're all about
Nonono babe, no, no, no, no don't lie
Because you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, gotta try

Ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ba da ba da ba da ba da badabada

[TABOO]
Yo, I'm lying to my girl
Even though I love her
And she all in my world
I give her all my attention and diamonds & pearls
She's the one who makes me feel on top of the world
Still I lie to my girl, I do it

[APL and FERGIE]
And I lie and I lie and I lie till there's no turning back
I don't know why, (and I lie and I lie till I don't know who I am)

damn man.. i feel so crippled without my com. And so bored.. cannot dl mp3s or even see any attachments to my mail cos my bro's com is so empty without any microsoft applications. Lousy!!!

Went for a movie jus now. Watched "I Not Stupid Too"... feels so much like my own life story being told out in certain scenes... *Bleahz* Made me cry...

Had been working all these while and is it true that being a cook usually loses all his/her friends? Cos of my inconsistent work schedules??? Sianz man... Dun even get to meet up with any o my friends frequently. *damn*

Been feeling rather down these few days.. dunno y... maybe it's me in my "wallowing in my sadness" season again... Shit man. But nehmind.. I know my princess does that once in a while too. Please dun ask me what is it. I also dunno the reason for it or even the cause. Hmmm.

I ahve a new nick called "piper" and as for the season why... here it is : "The pied piper played his magic flute and all the children followed... Don't ever stop singing!" That's from one of my good friends Delfi. Haha.

ciaoz 4 now. take care all of ya!